Self fulfilling prophecy and flowers

Beloved Flower Lover,

A Self Fulfilling Prophecy is a prediction that causes itself to come true due to the simple fact that the prediction was made. This happens because our beliefs influence our actions.

For example, if a woman thinks that her husband will leave her for another woman, she will act in ways that will directly or indirectly cause her belief to come true. She might get jealous easily and make a fuss about him being friends with other women. She might pick fights whenever she suspects that he is cheating on her, or she might go through his personal things to look for evidence of cheating. Eventually, her actions will put a strain on their marriage, and her husband just might leave her, causing her prediction to come true.

daffodil in bag with cat

Have you ever been asked to do a task, such as maybe you’re starting a new job, and you believed before you started that you wouldn’t be good at it? Maybe you thought to yourself, ‘I’m not going to be able to do this,’ only to try it out and realize that your fears were correct? This is known as a self-fulfilling prophecy.

A sociologist named Robert K. Merton created this term in 1948 to describe a false definition of the situation evoking a new behavior, which makes the originally false conception come true.

In other words, the prediction we make at the start of something affects our behavior in such a way that we make the prediction happen.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy in Action

Going back to our earlier example, let’s say you’re starting a new job as a receptionist but have never done that type of work before. You may have a strong belief that you won’t be able to handle the responsibilities. As you begin your job, you can’t think clearly, you keep saying negative things to yourself about the work you’re doing, and you’re in a lousy mood, so the customers dislike you.

Three weeks later, you lose the job. In this case, your negative expectations at the beginning of the job have affected your behavior to the point that your prediction comes true. Once that happens, we believe that our prediction must have been correct, which only encourages our confidence in future predictions, thereby perpetuating a reign of error, as Merton put it. Self-fulfilling prophecies are not limited to affecting only ourselves; we can also make predictions about other people that create the same type of results.

So let’s think about flowers, love, friendships, work, your health, your finances.

Where might you need to be radical to think you have real hope, real energy, to solve real problems? Where might you want to use flowers as your signpost symbol to remind yourself that you are flowering into that very wonderful thing you  predicted?

 

Just a thought

 

The Team,

The London Flower Lover

p.s. what else do you predict for yourself today?

Advertisements
Posted in Allow yourself!, Beauty, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dreading the first day back at work and decided to use the love for flowers to clean up our energy before we walk into 2018’s office

Beloved Flower Lover,

Dragging our feet about the first day back at work tomorrow. Talking to others in the team about the ton of encouraging messages flooded into our various emails for 2018 and wondering, now what?

We thought about all the lies in our head ( you know the shame or guilt about work success) and how loud they were becoming in our heads . e.g. The harder we tried in some areas of our business , the harder things became. We felt shame and guilt because we are the London Flower Lovers, are meant to be upbeat. The truth was sometimes  we were not even putting flowers around in our personal space. Finally something snapped. We enjoyed the winter solstice and we decided we needed to run the show.

We had decided to ditch all the ideas which came from fear or desperation  and made peace with the current experience of the flower business. and let go of attachment of making more of the business and instead focused on extreme service- like we used to do. The question was slowly being answered about how do we honour ourselves as we approach going to work tomorrow.

Well we love to make ‘our’ customers to feel good. And we notice that when push comes to shove, we lean into encouraging clients into feeling good more than anything. We love making people to feel good. We notice that when we do the self guilt or self shame thing, that we end up disconnecting from the very people we want to serve. And that feeling good becomes forgotten  and we just crumple. So what next?

So of course showing up with the right energy is the right thing for us to gently focus on because at the heart of it, we are not high pressure gals.

So what next?

Beating ourselves up!

Nope,

Not fun,

Feed up of not being turned on……no way.

Our mindset about the bewildering array of techniques out there- was it was just all too much!

So we decided to chuck away our leads. Stop going to intense networking events . To let go of high maintenance clients,  (you know the ones, who were only focused on  the short term  and cheapness ). And then we  decided to make a list of all the things we used to shame and guilt ourselves. And after writing it out. BREATHE IT OUT on the EXHALE and BURN the LIST.

We decided to stop hustling…..we were fed up.

Then after listening to lots of good ideas we personally opted on Jeanna Gabellin’s approach on clearing up ones energy. We opened ourselves to the beauty of our flowers again.

She talks  a lot about taking a low stress approach to life. To allow a dream  of joy. To guide selves using the fuel of joy, rather than  forcing yourself into things you do not want to do.  To avoid the  push yourself through your comfort zone stuff, to let that mentality go completely……mmmmm sounds delicious.

We took her main ideas on. They are:

  1. Focusing on what the client wants? rather than focusing on getting the client. focusing on servicing them only. There powerful ally to get them to achieve
  2. Do what we want, rather than what we feel forced to do. In other words focus on joy and love.
  3. Act like all clients are coming. Act like everything is right. To let go of all the pressure each day. Just being relaxed. This will inspire the good feeling. When you don’t need the client, you step into the feeling of abundance. In the energy of abundance. …. Jeanna we love this!

Feeling better already, seeds of ideas started to flow into our minds with a smile. So the next step before we go into tomorrow is to write up our answers to the next five questions.

The London Flower Lover The seed

  1. How do we want to feel about ourselves as we interact with clients?
  2. What do we want to bring forth for our clients?( values, skills)
  3. What do we have to release? ( any shameful/guilty secret insecurities, like “oh gosh we need to make x amount of money by now”, or “it’s taken this long”, ” its too expensive to live here” , or “we should be better at this by now”, etc)
  4. Why do our services rock?- write that down
  5. What’s the best, most fantastical possible outcome?

Feeling good already, this is the energy we carry into tomorrow. The energy we carry before we make any phone call or even touch a flower.

 

We are ready to move through the next day, next week, next quarter, next year!

thelondonflowerlover flowers easter egg bunny and bag

 

This is about the process!

 

Hope you found something useful in this.

 

xxx

The Team,

The London Flower Lover

Posted in Allow yourself!, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Be gentle,soft and have no expectations as you approach successful change, become like the softest petal ever

Beloved Flower Lover,

Amazing opportunities on the horizon. Could she now achieve what she wanted. Gleeful….she was met by her elders who told  her to calm down as she approached change.

She was told not be forceful…to  soften, to be kind to herself  and others and to not try to force others to change if they did not agree with her.  And for those who want advice from her, to be gentler, quieter,  kinder , softer.

The voice of beautiful creativity and change thelondonflowerlover Collage

Dealing with her elders helped remind her that she did not have to go at it like it was out of her control. Patience, pace, and peace. Calm down,soften up, slow down.That’s what will make the difference today.

 

The Team,

The London Flower Lover

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Not feeling Christmassy today- why not? Feedback from those who attended the Winter Solstice Flower Workshop say they feel brilliant today

Beloved Flower Lover,

Just felt the need to share. Been talking to two sets of people today already.

It’s Christmas day and some people in London say they don’t feel Christmassy. They don’t feel like they have anything to look forward to. They have  holiday but have no energy. Their energy is low and miserable. They say it’s just for children and that no one is looking after them. They feel bound up in what ever they are doing. Underneath a rock and just getting by.Tired of the over consumerism of the holiday and unwilling to spend money they do not have.

No energy on Christmas day. Keeping it real they say!

We spoke to another group. All  the people we worked with on our Winter Solstice workshop feel thrilled, excited and looking forward to the next year. They have reported a shift in attitude, a shift in beliefs as they engaged totally in the flower workshop process. They have generated a bright energy.

Comparing these two sorts of people,  the light bulb went on.

Oh gosh, it’s so true, spending time during the Winter Solstice to focus on forgiveness, giving thanks for the previous year, and stepping into the pleasure of their dreams realized. They report that they are  now operating on another level. The winter solstice flower workshop the londonflowerlover1Generating their own light energy and clarity about how to enjoy life. Mmmmmm a number of insights going on there. Curious about this?

 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

The Team

 

The London Flower Lover

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The return of the light has return-The sun of man has been reborn, let’s enjoy flowers!

Beloved Flower Love,

A fresh start is now here.

Have you ever noticed how many religions have lots of holidays at this time of year. Well its all to do with the shortest day of the year and then the celebration of the return of the light. Yes, The return of longer days. The return of the sun!

The sun of man has been reborn.

In the depth of winter, We celebrate the return of your light. What ever inspires the sunlight within you- we celebrate!

sunflower Collage

The team,

The London Flower Lover

Posted in celebrations, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Thank you!

Beloved Flower Lover,

We appreciate you. You are on our gratitude list.

Thank you.

Xxx

thanks thank you hetheru  handtieimages

gratitude
ˈɡratɪtjuːd/
noun
  1. the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
    “she expressed her gratitude to the committee for their support”
    synonyms: gratefulness, thankfulness, thanksappreciationrecognitionacknowledgem
Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

W H Murray gifts us with a spectacular poem that says get committed now as your dream your impossible dream…and enjoy the sizzle of that ideal as we stand still in the Winter Solstice.We gift you with flowers!

Beloved Flower Lover,

Our brains is not the source of creativity, the source is….stand it it’s stillness and silence and dream!

Stand in the silence right now and dream the impossible and enjoy the sizzle of that. It that energy that will make the dream sink or swim.

rose petal the london flower lover

W.H. Murray – Until One Is Committed

Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation) there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:

that the moment one definitely commits oneself,
then providence moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help one that would not otherwise have occured. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour
all manner of unforseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man would have dreamed would come his way.

I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe’s couplets:

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it! Boldness has genius, magic, and power in it.”

W.H. Murray
from The Scottish Himalayan Expedition

Your relationship is what this is all about. To be available to your greatest dream!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Posted in Allow yourself!, celebrations, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

At the Winter Solstice Brendon reminds us to have joy in our lives and how to generate it from within….we use flowers to remind us all of our beautiful nature !

Beloved Flower Lover,

We are so joyful, solstice is on it’s way….yippee!A time to stand still and give thanks for all that there is and will be and has been.

We have taken off work and resting, and found another Brendon Burchard video which reminds us to use the 2nd and 3rd person to affirm images and words of peace, joy and happiness to ourselves. Doing this from the inside out reminds us that we are beautiful people.

winter

We learn to take control of our energy by generating joy and as you know we use flowers to remind us of the awesomeness of our nature. Brendon and Marie in the following video talk about so many good things that we would love you to put into action as you go into the solstice period.

 

Posted in Allow yourself!, celebrations, Cheer Me Up, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What or who does a millennial turn to for help when they need to form deep relationships. Perhaps turn to flowers and reach out and make a deep connection with others

Beloved Flower Lover,

The selfie generation are asking questions about rebuilding their self esteem and developing real relationships.  The Winter solstice is a time to think about all of that.

Love, joy, all these things take time.

  1. Ask for help
  2. Be prepared for the journey
  3. Choose someone to love and share with them your love

Roses Beauty

 

 

 

The Team,

 

The London Flower Lover

Posted in Allow yourself!, Cheer Me Up, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

It’s not about the joy that flowers give you, it’s the fact that you practice joy and flowers remind you that you already able to do that- our Winter Solstice gift to you!

Beloved Flower Lover,

We really thought we were not going to post before the Winter Solstice, but could not help sneaking in another gift. You are our gift. You read what we produce and because of that we are deeply appreciative.

peace winter solstice flowers

We found a video  by this chap in the USA called Brendan Burchard that we felt was not only inspirational, but described what we feel we is behind what we do for you. We felt he was describing the message we are serving you .

Please watch this, like really please watch it…..he describes why we are passionate about this blog, flowers and you……You will also notice that we are in Winter Solstice time. Please watch it during this time as it has a message for you, us.

winter solstice flowers  Collage

Thank you. We hope you find that this is a true gift.

It’s what we can give to you. Love you

The Team,

The London Flower Lover

 

 

 

Posted in Allow yourself!, celebrations, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment