Beloved Flower Lover,
What did she do that took her from Heartbreak, to not one but three men at once?
It was definitely an affirmative journey, an opening, building a personal message of reciprocated love that didn’t happen overnight, yet did happen by giving herself a peaceful place for respecting how she really felt and open up to change.
It took time but she stayed at affirming her life as changing. She told us, that there were times when she felt like giving up. She kept yielding and giving into images, and pictures of peacefulness. Allowing herself to see herself move forward even if it was just in humble baby steps.
Keeping a simple attitude towards her surroundings, affirming images of peacefulness, within her environment, using flowers she thought of as elegant, she found herself led, giving way to her self care.
When we first knew her she couldn’t get past the fact that Paul had just disappeared. Yes, she went on dates but found them all boring and always ‘wished’ she was with Paul. She didn’t enjoy the dates at all and just didn’t see the point of dating at all.
Our early conversations with her were about the hurt, loss, and regrets of being without the man she believed she was to be with forever. She felt betrayed and disappointed by the promise that he would call her while he was away when he hadn’t contacted her at all. Those thoughts just broke her heart all over again. Again, and again and again. Those feelings also rippled through her friendship circle. Grief and anger was her energy.
She used to describe herself as being lost and couldn’t even begin to move on until she was able to get an answer for what happened in the first place. They got along so well she would say. They had great times together she said. How could things change so rapidly? It was painful, inelegant, tasteless and sadly vulgar in her eyes and yet no other man came close to being what Paul was in her eyes.
She imagined that she must have been the problem. That somehow Paul did not like who she was. To get to happiness, something had to change from despair to peace of mind we thought. We just held a space for peacefulness, not saying anything to her about enjoying taking neither loss or gain to heart. Just listening from our hearts.
We gently asked her what was really underneath all of this for her. We were very privileged as she shared her treasured fears. Her Relationship-Slayer Beliefs as we called them which were holding her captive. Awkwardly and gawkily holding her in an uncomfortable place. Keeping her away from anything, including the possibilities of a new love.
The way we see it the best way to explain Slayer Beliefs, those core beliefs is to have you have a picture of an iceberg. The things we know and are aware of are above the surface of the iceberg. Now you know that an iceberg can extend all the way down to the deep sea floor where we can’t see how far down it goes. That is the same thing for your Slayer Beliefs.
By the way, we describe slayer beliefs as being negative. Meaning they are not the things you would consciously want. These core beliefs, the ones which create a vivid, sharp, big picture which you use to be describing yourself are what you respond to. They are images of you not having, or you expressing yourself as failing in some way and you being stressed by that. The picture explains in a clear, distinct, well defined image what exactly distinguishes you as not deserving. It’s an image you are just not aware you are believing in. It could come from someone else you admire, or it was an image imprinted on yourself describing your potential to you, when you where very young. When you did not know any better. Whatever, this sort of character,the image you have of yourself shows up in your behaviour.
So, she was not aware of how she had immersed herself in the classification that she had had of herself. These inner pictures she was responding to, telling herself, about herself, about men and about love.
We really got excited when we heard this, because we saw a divinely perfect woman, and are happy to use flowers to support someone with their Slayer Beliefs because we always want to take them if they choose, to where they want to go,beautifully!!
And when we create designs through the eyes of believing divine peace and the elegance of their natural design we know they can shift the log blocks.
Hey, we all have these blocks. So together we get inspired to bring them up to the surface so we can work through them. Floral design is how we choose to express and describe the truth of our nature. Beliefs are a choice. The images we hold in our imaginations which we use to describe and express ourselves are a choice. Enjoying the peace of our natural design. The simple foundation of life is what we look at when we are choosing what to believe about, ourselves, you, and in this case this 49 year old woman. It was this shift that led her to experience her own inner love and that changed her life.
The next phase of her journey ,we see as a ‘Brainy break’ instead of ‘Heartbreak’, or a ‘bright break’, a ‘clever break’, a ‘glamour break’, a ‘chic break’ any thing that acknowledges it as a blessing. We suggested that perhaps she take a pause from dating for a while. To use the opportunity to energise herself with self-care. A time to give herself the space, the opening, the rest, breather, to give herself a leg up, so changing her life. She did it, things changed.
It was interesting during this time Paul contacted he. They met and had a great time. He asked to see her again and didn’t show up! He called and told her something came up. This just confused her more.
She was really being cautious this time around and wanted to close her heart. She was irritated, annoyed, frustrated. Yet because of her other self care practise. Her decision to focus on peace, on stillness, on tranquility each time she gazed at her beautiful flowers, she blessed him, wished him wellness and enjoyed the choice of enjoying peace for herself.
She was beginning to notice a picture of who she was when they were together. It was all about him in that picture. She was grateful to observe that she did not describe herself as the sort of woman who received love in the picture. Wow. Now that was something to give thanks for, now she saw the real picture she was dancing to.
She thanked him. Like an angel, she realised he had handed her the biggest love gift ever. Again, she sent him love and peace,wanting the best for his life and got on with her own life,now immersed with self care activities. And yes, he called again.
She gave him one last chance and guess what, he left her abandoned after promising to be there again, – no phone call, no text, nothing!
What a brilliant teacher, angel, he took her all the way. Her self image was completely provoked and she realised that she had already shifted. When it happened she smiled because of the focus on stillness, peace and calm she had been picturing came flooding through. Now this part of the story only led her to realize that she was already freed, already had had the choice to focus on images of what she wanted to receive.
She peacefully realised that she was already sending him peaceful love through the stillness of her quiet moments. She had let go of desperation. She was feeling peace because she was sending those pictures towards herself first about herself. She was untied, unchained, released and liberated, no longer desperate. Still doing her self care activities that including flowers and other things. She continued to enjoy peace and its gifts.
She was such a loving, giving, beautiful person and ready to experience receiving love back.
We encouraged her to find more specific ways that pictured herself liberated. She visualised giving herself permission to receive the love she enjoyed and avoid images of herself settling for less. By practising looking at beautiful images including flowers and creating these inner images in her imagination, which she could enjoy peacefully, she started dating again.
This time she did things with an awareness and confidence that she never had before. It started out slowly. She went on three different dates with three different men that allowed her to see the difference in the way she could be treated.
All were smitten with her and interested in a long-term relationship.
The next decision she saw was choosing someone who will be by her side forever. She sees marriage, a happy married life, and having the family she’s always wanted. Peacefully.
Heartbreak’ and transforming it into a picture of the happiness she deserves, we were compelled to share her story.
We are curious how others have used imagery to create the next step forward away from heartbreak and one step closer to their picture of real happiness.
Having flowers around simply reminds you that you are activating your own self-care, which acknowledges your own exquisite naturally peaceful self. A reminder of your naturally blossoming self, an energetic switch to say you are turned onto you.
We love you and would love to hear your thoughts.
The London flower lover