Finally what could you do with a man who keeps having sex with you and does not want to marry you

Beloved Flower Lover,

Friday, a woman came in distressed about all the sex she was having with a man who did not want to marry her. We said little but just showed her an article and she bought her usual arrangement and left……what did we share…..well an article from the Love Doctor.This is a note from her that we copied from her email.

“Dear Dr. Diana,

I keep picking these guys who just don’t want to commit. I don’t know what it is. I just broke up with the third one who was like that.  We dated for a year and he was so squeamish about introducing me to his family, including me in holidays, etc.  When we first met he said he was open to marriage and children and he seemed to be smitten by me.  Things were amazing. But then he just got more and more distant. For no apparent reason! How can I stop myself from making this same mistake again???”  ~Fed-up in Portland

I often get emails like this from women who are disappointed in love time and time again.  Usually they are choosing the wrong partners. Absolutely the wrong guys.  And not even realizing it!!

This is a very serious self-sabotaging problem guaranteed to leave you on the couch with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and a tissue box every time. 
Seeing women go through this pattern of disappointment is what led me in part to start my professional Love Mentoring program.  A trained Love mentor is the perfect person to have in your life who can help you choose truly available guys. And right now you  can have a FREE session with one of my highly experienced Love Mentors. More on this later. (If you want to jump on this now, contact me at to arrange your free Love Mentoring session).
So let’s take a look at which kind of men are not  commitment-phobes, which kind of men are more like the “marrying kind.”  This way, when you date guys you can quickly find some markers that tell you that this person might be TRULY INTERESTED in being in a love relationship that lasts.So here is a brief excerpt on this topic from my book, Love in 90 Days. There are dozens of other important tips about how to avoid the DUDs (Definitely Unworkable Dudes) and find the STUDs (Seriously Terrific, Utterly Devoted Dudes) in the book.  So definitely pick it up in either kindle or paperback. It only costs $11 and it can change your love life!  Just click on this Amazon link: Love in 90 Days.The “Marrying Kind” of Men: What the Research Shows

Rutgers University and The National Marriage Project conducted a national study that showed that married men were more likely than single men to have grown up with both biological parents.  Almost half of the married guys reported going to religious services several times a month.  Less than one quarter of the unmarried men did.

When these researchers sorted out the “Marrying Kind” of single men they found a similar difference.  Those that came from traditional backgrounds in intact families and those who attended religious services regularly each month were more likely to agree with the following statement: “You’d be ready to marry tomorrow if the right person came along.”  Also, a Gallup poll showed that the vast majority of these men are seeking a “soul-mate,” who will fulfill their emotional, sexual and spiritual desires and will also share breadwinning responsibilities.

The study went on to cite significant differences between the ‘marrying kind’ and the non-marrying kind.  Marriage avoiders were more likely to:

  • distrust women to tell the truth about prior relationships
  • worry more about the risks of divorce
  • say they did not want children
  • believed that singles have better sex lives than marrieds
  • agree to the statement that “there are so many bad marriages today it makes one question the value of marriage.”
  • say that at this stage of life they just wanted to have fun
  • express the concern that, “If you marry, your biggest concern would be losing your personal freedom.”

Ladies, there are some important clues here.

Obviously, there are wonderful, available guys who don’t fit the complete profile of the ‘marrying kind.’  Nevertheless, the research is convincing that good parental role models and a spiritual or religious background help in molding guys who are more serious about commitment. If marriage is your goal, you may want to watch early on for info and clues about a guy’s upbringing; eagerness for marriage; spiritual or religious activities; general distrust of women; and his fears about losing personal freedom. If marriage or a permanent commitment is your goal, don’t waste your time on the ‘non-marrying kind’; they will only break your hearts.

Much more on this is available in the book.  Get it here: Love in 90 Days.

Love is very tricky and you have to keep your eyes open about who you are dealing with and have guidance to get the treasure.  I just launched a personalized one-on-one dating coach Love Mentoring service.  Now for the very first time you can work with a handpicked Love Mentor who has used the Love in 90 Days principles to get happily married.  Each mentor is a seasoned transformational coach who is directly supervised by me.  This is an incredibly powerful way to make your love dreams come true! And for a limited time you can have a free 40 minute session by phone or Skype.  But hurry, the time slots are filling up fast. Contact me at to arrange your free Love Mentoring session.

Here’s a letter from Erin, who’s having terrific success meeting guys with the mentoring program:

“Hi Diana – I have been in the mentoring program for a month now and I am a new woman. I’m on the program of three and can’t count how many guys are interested. I’m so happy I’ve given myself this gift. Men think I am confident, beautiful, smart, etc. because of the love intention that I am projecting. The Diamond Self exercise has just brought out my charisma in social situations like you wouldn’t believe. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge with the world!!” ~ Erin, Chicago

***If Erin can do it, so can you!

To learn more about my one-on-one mentoring program go to:

what could be better than this? we are so open to your suggestions

The Team

The London Flower Lover

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About Thelondonflowerlover

Welcome to The London Flower Lover. We are florists who create floral collections to tell your real life story. With colour and texture, we take floristry into an entirely new direction based on the challenges and joys of your life. Offering what we call 'heart based floristry' we use style, fashion, and life situations and merge them with heart based lifestyle support. This inspiring blend creates so much more for those who love flowers. Using flowers in the traditional way of course, but always using flowers to open up a floralicious conversation about relationships of all kinds. We are a sort of work in progress of compassionately confirming how we are already on the inside, the love we want to see out in the world. That is mission of The London Flower Lover. So saying yes to recognising that is at the heart of this blog and using flowers to honour that inner world is how we use the beauty of giving and receiving flowers. This blog is your blog. It's as much about cultivating your heart, as it is about enjoying the physical beauty of flowers. It offers story, poems and video to reflect the life you actually live whilst showing beautifully inspiring collections of flower designs. Hand-tied bouquets, arrangements and more. All this with sought after tips from well established experts on how to keep a happy heart. This is what makes The London Flower Lover unique and magical. Yes, and that's how we make the difference that we do. When life looks, feels, or sounds challenging, we offer a sanctuary that you may dip into. A well of refreshment and strength that you may draw from. Sharing what others have found to be successful ways of being happy in the face of challenges, whilst letting flowers do the talking when we have no other way to interpret what is going on. Use flowers to help you re-discover, reveal and remember how you can still be despite challenges. Use flowers to celebrate and to embody the possibility of your heart felt desire, fulfilled. Use flowers in your life, to remind you of the beauty of your life. Use The London Flower Lover today. We invite you to stay curious in this floral universe as you explore the love in the heart. This is a floralicious world.
This entry was posted in Inspirational love and sex, Men, Women's sensuality and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Finally what could you do with a man who keeps having sex with you and does not want to marry you

  1. samatha says:

    oops, I wanted to say what I said here, love your work, flowers really help to reduce anxiety it helps to remove ambivalence and enjoy life, so can become something that want to become. This pattern can be helped and unglued


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