How to use flowers to let go of your victimhood

Beloved Flower Lovers

Many people enjoy flowers to remind themselves of their true expression particulary after they are having a difficult time of it. We wondered a lot about victim hood and just played with it

The London Flower Lover

The London Flower Lover

Lets bring love to the world.  ‘A victim’ is a perspective on a situation which can develop into a perspective on life. The question is, do we also have the choice to be other-than-a-victim?

We don’t mean to diminish the terrible things that happen to some people, rather we are aiming to highlight that how we perceive ourselves as a victim is a relationship between one’s self and the world.


This begs the question: how would we like to relate to the world?

We also wonder, is it possible for someone to completely ‘give up’ their capacity to be a victim? We doubt it since the capacity to feel victimised is within us all ,yet we know someone will give us a viewpoint on this.We so welcome it, so please share.

Our guess is that this fear may not so much be about being a victim, but more about the consequences of not being a victim. If we stop considering ourselves as a victim, what then would we have to do? And what would we have to not do anymore? What are we actually giving up?

When a fear is strong enough then just attempting to consider what we would like can be a challenge. However, that’s not a reason to not ask the question – quite the opposite.

As anside, one of the main reasons we put so much emphasis on seeking a desired outcome from a client about their floral designs is because this provokes reactions from those aspects of their system that would rather stay the same. As these manifest the client, the client can consider something different.To recieve light on the ideas.

But what if stating a clear desired outcome is not yet within our capacity? When we recognise that our victim is a perception of a relationship, that knowing can be embodied  and we can then set an intention to relate to the world in some other way – even if we don’t yet know what that is. If we set an intention, the contradictions in maintaining a victim position are likely to become more and more apparent. But maintain it we will – if it serves us enough.

What we notice is that you may only be able to take a horse to water, but the more times you do the stronger the message gets. Until,  the horse realises drinking is in its own long-term interest.

Interesting eh!

Who would we be if we changed?

How can we  know the answer until we are that person? Again there is a choice: We can either continue being who they are for many years to come (which presumably is unsatisfying), or we can evolve into the unknown. Only at that point will we be able to decide whether our new identity is satisfying enough, and if not, the process will need to continue.

We have found that, paradoxically, before a person can evolve their identity they often have to acknowledge who they are – warts and all. We are referring to a deep acceptance  of ‘what is’. When we accept in this way, change is relatively easy. We are not suggesting acceptance is a precondition for identity change (whatever that is), We are saying this is what we have observed happening in a numerous cases.

The bottom line is, do we really want to change? Of course not. We all have a wish that our problems would just go away. However, when that doesn’t happen, sometimes we are prepared to do what it takes. Then we can start doing little things that are aligned with our preferred identity. Mahatma Gandhi wasn’t messing when he said “Be the change”.

If we are unsure what our preferred identity is then we can make a best guess, try it out and get some feedback from the world. Make up a story of what we best want. Then we’ll know whether we want more of that, or to try something else instead. This may be difficult and painful, but no one ever said that change had to be easy, simple and painless. Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn’t. Again no one can know until after they have attempted to make the changes.

Gosh, all of this on the eve of the Chinese New Year.

Use flowers to remind you to your highest expression. Use flowers to remind you to stay with change as you move into a new life. Use flowers to stretch your understanding of yourself so you can move into the change you want. Use flowers, we have tons of ideas for designs for you. Its exciting. The time for change is still here. Why do you care?

We can really help create designs that just reflect what you most want.

Love you all

The Team

The London Flower Lover

The London Flower Lover


About Thelondonflowerlover

Welcome to The London Flower Lover. We are florists who create floral collections to tell your real life story. With colour and texture, we take floristry into an entirely new direction based on the challenges and joys of your life. Offering what we call 'heart based floristry' we use style, fashion, and life situations and merge them with heart based lifestyle support. This inspiring blend creates so much more for those who love flowers. Using flowers in the traditional way of course, but always using flowers to open up a floralicious conversation about relationships of all kinds. We are a sort of work in progress of compassionately confirming how we are already on the inside, the love we want to see out in the world. That is mission of The London Flower Lover. So saying yes to recognising that is at the heart of this blog and using flowers to honour that inner world is how we use the beauty of giving and receiving flowers. This blog is your blog. It's as much about cultivating your heart, as it is about enjoying the physical beauty of flowers. It offers story, poems and video to reflect the life you actually live whilst showing beautifully inspiring collections of flower designs. Hand-tied bouquets, arrangements and more. All this with sought after tips from well established experts on how to keep a happy heart. This is what makes The London Flower Lover unique and magical. Yes, and that's how we make the difference that we do. When life looks, feels, or sounds challenging, we offer a sanctuary that you may dip into. A well of refreshment and strength that you may draw from. Sharing what others have found to be successful ways of being happy in the face of challenges, whilst letting flowers do the talking when we have no other way to interpret what is going on. Use flowers to help you re-discover, reveal and remember how you can still be despite challenges. Use flowers to celebrate and to embody the possibility of your heart felt desire, fulfilled. Use flowers in your life, to remind you of the beauty of your life. Use The London Flower Lover today. We invite you to stay curious in this floral universe as you explore the love in the heart. This is a floralicious world.
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2 Responses to How to use flowers to let go of your victimhood

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